Physically I'm doing well. I have only a small gut leftover from the pregnancy. I lost my pregnancy weight quickly, but I'm doing really good if I can manage to get 3 meals in a day. And I haven't restarted exercise. I was cleared by the doc at my 6 week postpartum appointment to return to all normal activity. Mentally I'm still very sleep deprived, and I still have no clue what I am doing as a parent the majority of the time. And I've experienced a lot of breastfeeding-related psychological conflict, as detailed below. (I know a lot of people can't relate to my breastfeeding conflicts, but, oh well. Just skip the next few paragraphs if you're not interested.)
Breastfeeding update: I could write a book about my breastfeeding experience, or do weekly blog updates. But I will spare you all. Check out kellymom.com and you'll see how complex breastfeeding can be, and how much there is to know about it. The learning curve for BF'ing is steep. I feel like if we have a 2nd child, the breastfeeding would go so much smoother. If anyone has any questions, don't hesitate to ask. Basically I wanted to exclusively breastfeed her, but that didn't work out. It has taken me awhile to finally accept that she will not be exclusively breast fed. And a major turning point for me was realizing it doesn't have to be all-or-nothing, she can be formula fed and supplemented with some breastmilk, which is better than nothing. After 2 weeks BF'ing gets a little easier and after 4 weeks it gets even easier. However, by around 4 weeks I had passively quit. I let things fade out, gave myself a break, and tried to see what it would be like and how I would feel about not breastfeeding. Things were better for me but not for baby, causing more psychological conflict. Baby continued to choke, cough, spit up, and have her gastrointestinal problems after eating formula. I felt guilty allowing her to have so much formula when I knew she digested my breastmilk much easier. But she had nipple confusion by breastfeeding and bottle feeding, which I also felt badly about. When I finally admitted to my husband that I wasn't breastfeeding anymore, I immediately regretted it. I had been feeling as if I was mourning a loss - the special connection, my ability to provide her with the "perfect food." If I give myself a fresh start knowing what I know now, would it work out better? So I decided to give it a 2nd chance, and tried something called relactation, or getting my milk to come back in. Unfortunately, at 6 weeks we're pretty much done with breastfeeding...
Modern day life is incompatible with breastfeeding: women returning to work {for obvious reasons like being away from baby, but also if I wasn't returning to work, I might not give up on BF'ing, it's a HUGE commitment and it could take us 6 weeks or more just to get going well, only to be separated by my return to work}, not co-sleeping, feeding schedules {allowing baby to comfort nurse after feedings and to lead BF'ing when trying to establish BF'ing would be anti-schedule}, breastfeeding practices and philosophies are incompatible with much of the current philosophy of caring for baby {it seems that BF'ing endorses a lot of the attachment parenting style which is increasingly frowned upon by more current parenting styles}, being able to supplement with formula which can reduce your milk supply and demand...
Also, to have successful BF'ing you need to be drinking at least 64 oz daily, be eating and sleeping decently well, and not badly stressed - things I've had trouble with postpartum while trying to BF. Ironically, now that we are not BF'ing, it is so much easier to meet these requirements for successful BF'ing!
We have not been co-sleeping as DH isn't onboard. However, the sleep deprivation of new parenthood can be unreal, and most of the time I just pass out, so maybe it's for the best. Although the Snuggle nest that we have is designed for safe co-sleeping. Oh well.
DH and I went out to dinner without baby, my first time away from her. Yes, I missed her and thought of her often. Since then, her grandparents have watched her for an afternoon, and then a full day. It is great to have the time for myself and to be able to do things, but I also miss her so much!
We're also taking short videos of her, but I'm unable to load them at this time.
Hanging out with her grandparents 
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